Many shades of me.

Am I the only person with one mind,  one soul,  one heart,  but many faces. 

Can you tell them apart? 

Many say I have the face of a strong girl,  wise and courageous. 

Look a little closer,  can you see me ugly,  foolish and scared? 

They say I have the face of a good girl, 

Now come nearer, can you see the bad girl inside of me? 

In the morning  when I wake, I asked myself which face shall I wear?

But almost all these faces, do you see the real me.? 

Do you see someone you can talk to? 

Do you see the child inside? 

Do you see the wild face? 

Do you see my rage,  my dreams,  and my screams? 

I just leave one day at a time. 

If I can make it through today,  tomorrow is jump and pass. 

Now open your eyes, look at me, who do you see? 

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Lazy Naturalista

           

         Saturday's at home used to be very busy, cleaning, washing and getting done with any other house chores that pilled up during the week. 

But today seems different, there were some men and women in suit, and some in flashy clothes. 

My aunty wore a bright peacock coloured attire that hurt my eyes,  what's going on? 

"gather around eveeyone"  my aunty said. 

Where is segun?  

I came Ma, 

Hmm... Who does that? What is I came. 

I don't even know why they made he our chef,  his grammar is terrible. 

"We have visitors today, actually some Nollywood celebrities are around . They have come to see oga "

What for aunty?  

It's not of your business. 

This woman is at it again.. But I wasn't bothered,  my mind was reeling,  I was so happy.  I had never seen Bollywood stars with my naked eyes before, except on TV. 

" everyone should be wellbahaved, no running around and shouting on top of your voice"

Yes Ma! We all chorused. 

 The room was silent now,  all eyes were at the door and windows trying to take a look at the visitors,  from where I stood I could see Genevieve and Desmond Elliot. 

Wow,  I must take pictures with them today, I said. 

If I tell my classmates celebrities came to our house,  they won't believe, so I need a proof. 

Few minutes later,  my aunt came calling. 

What is it again,  I though you said you don't want us running around. 

"our visitors are about to leave, we are going to take pictures with them,  get ready! "

Wow... Finally.. I felt like screaming. 

I dashed back into the room,  sprinkled a little quantity of powder on my hand, smoothness and smeared it on my face. 

I was ready for the photo shoot. 

"why is your hair looking so unkempt and your face,  what happened?  Don't you know how to rub powder again?"

Why didn't they inform us or even give us a hint the day before so I would prepare! 

I loosened my hair yesterday so I could make another one today.

My hair wasn't as bad as my aunty was making it look.  Don't mind her. 

"I look okay Ma. " 

Who told you that? , you don't look okay at all, go back. 

This people knew that I wore my natural hair, why is the devil trying  to use the now? 

I remember my sister telling me about a group she just joined on facebook that has been teaching her how to manage her natural hair., what's the name again?  I can't remember, I was too glued to the TV screen, project Fame on my mind. 

How was it my fault that my natural hair was so tough.  I couldn't make a comb pass through it no matter how I tried. 

I walked back into the room, just then I remembered the hairstyle a contestant had worn. 

" yes, it was her natural hair. "

She just tied it in a bun and it looked really nice. 

I swung into action. I was the master of the fire brigade approach,  so. NO shaking. 

I did not even need to comb the hair again. 

I rubbed shea butter on it,  my sister used it alot. I looked for a flowery scarf,and then I tied my hair in a bun. 

It looked h

Just perfect. 

I ran outside just before they took the first shot. 

I saw the look on Genevieve's face

" is that your natural hair? "

Yes ma, I said 

"it's so beautiful,what do you use? "

Thank you Ma,  as for your question, you don't want to know, I said in my mind. 

We won again. 

We did it. 

My natural hair is bae

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Silence kills; don't be like me.

          Our union was made in heaven, so I thought. I have found the perfect spouse, the last of a dying breed,  in a world of no good men. I felt so loved and safe in his arms. I was constantly assured of our undying love for each other.
You see,  I never thought I would find someone as intelligent and good looking as he was.
We have been married for 8 months now, after dating for just 2months, even when my mum advised I should be a little patient and wait for about a year before walking down the aisle with Desmond.
"mum, good men are hard to find these days, we are in a new era.  I love Desmond and he loves me too"
Ours was love at first sight.

Weeks into the marriage I discovered the nasty temper my spouse had. He could smash and destroy anything at the slightest provocation. once my HP laptop got smashed and split into pieces right before my eyes. He got offended at the minutest of things.
I am not left out,  time and again, I get hit in different places. Last week I sustained an injury very close to my eyes. A friend had seen been at the mall and asked what happened.. I manage to meander the question while insisting I was fine.
I adhere strictly to instructions
" don't let a third party into your home"
       
          I have been beaten with a belt and even sustained a cut from a kitchen knife.
But after every storm comes a calm,  the anger wanes, apologies are rendered,  promises are made and we wake up. Love is forgiving after all  .

My husband is jealous to a fault and very possessive. I had to cut off all contacts and loosed touch with my friends and family. They were Getting too inquisitive and who knows, they might try to talk me out of my marriage.  I can't recall how many times my spouse seized my phone, my social media accounts has been closed.
        Something  has really gone wrong. This is not the man I got married too.  I have been duped. So, people can pretend like this.
I have been deceived by his seemingly nice appearance,  I got carried away.
I am beyond embarrassed to admit or ask for help, as am not longer closes to my friends and immediate family.
We went out last night, to sit out somewhere after on of our numerous clashes.
I ran into Chris, my High school sweetheart, on our way out,  I was over joyous,  I haven't seen him in years.
We hugged and I introduced him to my spouse,  we chatted for a while and then parted.
When I got into the car,  I was still fishing over his fortunate I was to run into such a person, when I felt something hard hit my head,
Aarrgh what was that?

My God,  the Jack in  the boot. 

I hear voices,  my husband is crying and shouting, telling me to wake up, apologising endlessly, the doctors give their assurance to zap me back to consciousnesses.
I can hear my mum's voice, saying, I warned you! I warned you!!  But you won't listen.  She's also praying and crying. I feel for her.
On the contrary, I want nothing more but to sink into this black hole.  What was my crime?
To love and be loved in return.
If you happen to come by Lagos teaching hospital,  do well to visit the accidents and emergency unit,  help me talk to one of the doctors on duty.

Tell them to let me be. Am not coming  back.
Tell my mum I love her.

My name is Wendy.
I have been a victim of domestic violence.

I waited till it was too late, don't be like me.

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Welcome post

         I started blogging in 2015, when I read a friends post on her blog (ujuokorie@wordpress.com) I was captivated by the tittle of the post( my birthday souvenir) so I clicked on the link. After reading through the post, I took time around the blog,  I fell in love with the atmosphere,  and I heard a voice saying,  chi chi won't you love to own such?  

Yes! Yes!  Yes!  I answered. 

That was just the beginning , I started out on WordPress and I could see clearly it wasnt working for me probably because I couldn't get it right,  and then I met this guy Solomon moses; the game changer, most influential person 2016,  he blogs at ovijie.blogspot.com.

With his help I switched to blogger(pensivesharon.blogspot.com) 

Most of my posts there where random.  From it all, I learned about commitment,  discipline,  creativity,  and having a voice; a voice distinct from others. It allowed me to connect with different kinds of people. 

       On Inabunorahs.blogspot.com, expect my post to be random,  some personal and others conversational . You would surely be able to relate with them. 

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My neighbour was not aware.

I have Been away for a while., trust me it wasn't my making. Lemme quickly drop this before I disappear into the thin air again. 

So,  yesterday just as I sat humming a song and washing a few clothes. A conversation began between my neighbour  and I, it was quite interesting at first as we discussed feminism,  gender equality and the role of a woman in the home. I never knew this my neighbour was among the folks who paraded themselves as men,electing that a woman position in the home was synonymous to that of nanny. Shocking!  I tell you but that's a topic for another day. So leggo.

It was magical how this friendly conversation turned sour. Just a few more words he uttered stinged me like a bee. Ouch!!
That had hurt. 
I felt the urge to reply but the word "silence" kept ringing in a bell in my ears; so disturbing. 
         How could he say,  I should watch over the clothes he dried Incase it was about to rain, in his words ' you have nothing  to do, other than eat and sleep'. How could he have thought that because I decided to be indoors for a while I was jobless and idle. 

       My day was almost ruined but then I had a thought:

Words are powerful, they influence, they build, they shatter and terminate. People just like my neIgbours do not realise the power words hold. Whether you shoot on purpose or without purpose, your bullet still kills. Words are slow bullets atimes, when they are used wrongly. 
Had I accepted his words,  I would have looked  in the mirror to behold a pitiable image of myself . Yes,  I admit I was a bit hurt but it could have been worse. 

The way you choose to twist your tongue, can make another bleed on the inside.  Yes,  life and death are in the power of words. 
        

        Words are letters and punctuation marks put together-jokes are words too,  and there is no escape from it consequences. 
Today is the day to take decision on how you choose your words. 
I will use my words to build, not destroy,  to motivate,  not to 
discourage,  to kiss not to kill. 

If this is your decision, Just type  yes'in the comments box. 

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